Part 2: The First Few Days - Maybe, Maybe Not?

 And here we go with the update! In my last blog post, I committed myself to start saying self affirmations and practically forced myself to take time off of things in the morning. And, like  I promised, ever since then and for the last few days, I’ve been looking at myself in the mirror every morning, facing who I am, and maybe learning a couple new things about myself. 

Honestly, the beginning went exactly how I expected. On the very first day, I just kinda stared in the mirror, dreading it. I knew I had to but I really didn’t want to. It just seemed like such a strange thing to do, y’know? Chanting in the mirror by yourself every morning only to dance like a crazy person afterwards? Kinda strange. But I did it anyway. In all honesty, it felt super super awkward. I found myself almost muttering it, trying to keep as quiet as possible so my family didn’t hear me. Then, because I thought it might be better to take baby steps, I turned some music on on my laptop, plugged in some earbuds, and just kinda wiggled and head-bopped in my chair. Even though it felt awkward at first, it was honestly fun. I was glad to be forcing myself to let go, even if it was just for a little bit. I didn’t even have to work while I was listening to music (which I usually do).

Now, the question everyone’s probably asking: does it actually work? I could sit here and list off statistics and studies that it works but that’s not really what everyone’s here for, is it? You could look for that information yourself but you wanted a real, authentic opinion. Well, my answer might be a little disappointing. I actually don’t really know yet. There were times during the week where I would catch my reflection and my subconscious would whisper “wow, I’m cute” but I’m not sure whether to put that on the self-affirmations yet. Things like that would happen before. Even though it seems more frequent than before, that might just be because I notice it more often. I think, at the end of the week, to see if there was any sort of external difference, I’ll ask my boyfriend and family members if they noticed anything different about me. 

But if we were to assume that my newly grown “self-confidence” is a result of the self-affirmation, I’d call that a success! It’s only been a week and I’ve grown to be less tired of and more proud of my reflection. I also feel somewhat worth more; arguing back against people who I think don’t treat me the way I deserved to be treated. For example, if my boyfriend is being disrespectful, I’ll talk back when I hadn’t before because I know I deserve better than that. 

I don’t know. We’ll see how the rest of this week goes! 😊💖